Ha ha.

You Like Gladiator Movies?

I find it funny...

That they used this photo with these headlines.

Ha.

What else do they make?

The Bukkake Fountain perhaps?

We Have No Comment About The Name Of This Box Of Walmart Fireworks

I'm NC-17. Neato.

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

* gay (16x)
* death (10x)
* bomb (6x)
* drugs (4x)
* kill (2x)
* zombie (1x)

Best. Headline. Ever.

Butts charged with stealing toilet paper

'MARSHALLTOWN, Iowa—Police blame a woman named Butts for stealing toilet paper from a central Iowa courthouse, and while they're chuckling, the theft charge could put her in prison.

"She's facing potentially three years of incarceration for three rolls of toilet paper," Chief Lon Walker said, stifling a laugh as he talked to KCCI-TV about Suzanne Marie Butts. "See, I can't say it with a straight face."

Workers had noticed the rolls disappearing from the Marshall County Courthouse much faster than usual, Walker said.

Butts, 38, was caught last week after an employee saw her taking three rolls of two-ply tissue from a storage closet, Walker said.

Butts insisted it was the first time she'd pilfered toilet paper, but she declined to answer further questions on her attorney's advice.

The fifth-degree theft charge, a misdemeanor, normally carries a sentence of less than a year in jail. But Butts could face more time if convicted under the state's habitual offender law because she has prior theft convictions.

Walker did not know why Butts was at the courthouse, but said that she did not work there.'

What The Copy Editor Missed

Spring brings out the birthday suits in Vermont town

'BRATTLEBORO, Vt. (AP) - Spring has arrived in this southeastern Vermont shire town.

The trees are less bare, and some local residents are more so. Brattleboro has no ordinance, and Vermont no law, against public nudity. Some of the people who caused a stir last year when they began appearing downtown as nature made them are back.

Not everyone is happy.

Resident Theresa Toney said she was dining at a downtown restaurant when she spotted her first naked person of the spring. She looked out the window "and saw a man in his 60s walking up and down Main Street totally nude," she said. "This is indecent exposure where it doesn't belong."

Toney was one of the most vocal critics of public nudity when young people first started congregating without clothing in a downtown parking lot last year.

This week she was back before the Select Board, demanding to know what the town was going to do "about this behavior."

Audrey Garfield, chairwoman of the board, said she had spoken with the town manager, and that a log of complaints would be compiled.

Some are worried about the town's image.

"How do you want to be viewed as Brattleboro?" asked the Rev. Kevin Horion. "We want to welcome families with small children." Nudists could pop up anywhere, he said. "I am concerned we don't know where they are going to strike."'

In Context

Fun With Product Safety Images

Panopticon Of CPSC Hazardous Product Illustrations

What the copy editor missed.

'"I had just started changing. I had just put on the dress," Ashley said. "He tried to come in. He hooked his arm around my neck." The terrified teen struggled with the perv and slammed the dressing room door against him to beat him off.'

MACY'S SHOPPER BAGS NAKED PERV

That's a happy thought.

'It's likely that women reap similar benefits from napping, but not enough of them died during the study to be sure, said Dr. Dimitrios Trichopoulos, the study's senior author and a researcher at Harvard University and the University of Athens Medical School.'

Study: On-the-job naps might help heart