Scenes From Public Transportation

'Short Bus'

Scenes From Public Transportation

Inspecting Today's Purchases

I was being nosy trying to figure out what this cute Asian chick had purchased.

It was some weird tube thing that came part.

I think it was some sort of candlestick.

All was well, until she.......

unabashedly went digging for gold!!!

Both nostrils.

For like 10 minutes.

Grody.

Scenes From Public Transportation

Cooties

This guy was picking at his scalp the entire time I was on the bus.

Don't know if he had lice or what, but I'm glad I wasn't sitting anywhere near him.

Looking at him made my skin crawl.

Scenes From Public Transport

People Are Grody

This guy was clipping his nails on the bus.

Scenes From Public Transportation

'Pixie AKA Molly Ringwald'

If I get sick in the next few days, it will be because of her.

She sounded like she was coughing up a lung.

I tried to not breathe to catch her sickness cooties.

Scenes From Public Transportation

Dick Cheney Takes The Bus

Scenes From Public Transport

It's the chick from Sunscreem!

Scenes From Public Transport

Walk Softly And Carry A Big Cardboard Tube

Scenes From Public Transportation

It's the return of Mauxllet Guy! [Red arrow.]

And sitting behind him is Charlie! [White arrow.]

And behind him is Bod Mod Girl! [Yellow arrow.]

A triple threat!

Scenes From Public Transportation

'Bod Mod Girl'

This looks like any innocuous photo a student on her way home.

The thing is that in real life, she's actually all tat'd and pierced out.

I'm all for body modification; no big whup.

But what makes Bod Mod Girl interesting/post worthy, is that how she utilized two of these:



She has one implanted under the skin on top of each hand.

Kinda ick.

What grosses me out, is the thought of having 18 gauge barbells, with balls attached, sliding over my tendons and bones any time there was movement.

Grody.

Scenes From Public Transport

Dancing Grandma

Grandma here was rockin' some old big ass headphones.

Occasionally she would bust a move.

My concern for her was that she shouldn't be wearing headphones that totally cover her ears as it would make it easier for her to get jumped because she wouldn't hear someone sneaking up on her.

Scenes From Public Transportation

'Really, Grandma!?!'

This senior citizen* made me cranky.

You would figure if you were waiting at the bus stop for the next bus, you'd have a little time on your hands to, oh I don't know, fish for the change for the fare.

But noooooo, you had to get on the bus first and spend the next 10 minutes finding the correct combo of dimes and nickels to make the fare.

And to top that off, your noxious apple flavored power bar made me want to vom.

It was more overwhelming than the gallon of Youth Dew you decided to hose on.

* She wasn't really that old. Just called her that for color.

Scenes From Public Transport

Il Douché

Scenes From Public Transportation

Ghet-to Bus Stop

This bus stop is the nexus of a lot of routes and on the route [the 15] that extends from Downtown to all the way out to Saudi Aurora.

It traverses some of the seedier parts of East Colfax.

You know, the strip of ramshackle motels that support prostitutes and meth production.

It's always filthy, and everyone there always looks beleaguered, high, drunk, or suffering from some heinous health condition.

Last time I was on the 15, there was screaming babies, thugs, a barely breathing guy with emphysema and an oxygen tank, and my favorite, some junkie who was in between bouts of passing out with his fly wide open and pants falling down.

Needless to say I got off on an early stop.

Scenes From Public Transport

The Maux-llet

It's the hybrid of the faux-hawk and mullet.

His hair is actually a lot more 'party in the back' than it looks in this photo.

I actually am going to give him a snark pass as he was hubba hubba.

I tried to get a pic of his face, but couldn't do it discreetly, and him having about 75 pounds and a foot on me, meant an arse kicking wasn't worth it.

Interesting side note: I haven't be doing this feature as of late due to the fact that more and more people are using pub trans.

It's a lot harder to take DL photos of peeps when there's other on the bus.

Petula Clark - 'Don't Sleep In The Subway'

So, according to Ms. Clark, she wants you to go 'Downtown', where she 'Knows A Place', but wants you to make sure you 'Don't Sleep In The Subway'.

Unfortunately, people do:

Bus Stop

Waiting for the bus the other day, I noticed that someone had tried hiding a bike in the bushes.

And not more then three feet away is a memorial cross for someone who got killed on the highway.

Scenes From Public Transport

Tourists



Even Zac Efron Uses Public Transport



Fightin' Over Grammar



Men In Trees

[Seriously, if you look close, there's a guy in the tree cutting branches.]



What's that? It's Pat

[So, I sat by Pat the other night and due to the small feet, womanly hips, and fine skin, I am pretty sure Pat is a female to male transition. Case closed.]



Shift In The Space-Time Continuum

Scenes From Public Transport

Mary Hart's having an off day.

Scenes From Public Transport - 'What's That? It's Pat!'

Pat is either a trans-gendered or inter-sexed person, whose gender I can not identify.

I thought I had the issue solved, and that shim, was a guy.

But then this night, Pat was wearing something that reeked 80's Career Woman.

(S)he was wearing white sneakers with black socks.

You know, the look of working women on the go who commute in trainers, so that they don't kill themselves while wearing the heels they brought for the office.

So now I am stumped again.